Wednesday, July 3, 2013

Freedom from Hashtags

I’m not going to lie to you. I don’t #understand #Twitter.

I understand Facebook. It makes sense to me. See what your friends are up to by reading their posts and looking at their pictures. Visit links to videos or articles that they recommend.

Here’s a typical Facebook post:
Text reading “Today at the beach,” under which are pictures of their day at the beach. Simple.

What #doesntmakesense to me is #Twitter. #Whatisup with the #weirdlooking #URL links? I am #afraidtoclick on anything that looks like “de/6ghrt.fde.” How am I supposed to #knowwherethatgoes?

Here’s an actual #Twitter #tweet that showed up for me:
#airing Peter Gabriel - Big Time (via @brystelmy)

Huh? I think someone likes a #song, or is playing a #song right now. I think. Maybe.

And #whatisup with the #hashtags? I understand that they were originally meant to mark a word for searching, and they are still used for that. If I search for a specific term, any tweet with that term hashtaged will show up in my search. So you are hashtagging things to get other people to find your tweets. What I don’t understand is why you are hoping that a complete stranger will read that you loved the #waffles you just ate, and that they were #soyummy. Are you secretly hoping that all the people on Twitter who like #waffles will get together and form a #welovewafflesgroup?

The whole thing seems completely random to me. For instance, Twitter just suggested that I check out #biosnackysprouts. I don’t know what that means, and I am ultimately sure that I never expressed any interest in it, whatever it may be.

It wouldn't be so bad if people were just hashtagging single terms as a search tool like it was intended, but now they are inserting the punch line to their witty posts in a hashtagged, no-space word string, so I have to try and figure out what #idontlikespiders or #ilovesundayfunday means.

To make matters worse, I’m now seeing hashtags on Instagram photos. I’m not even 100% sure what Instagram is, but I do know it didn’t need hashtags. To make matters even worse, people are also starting to put them in their Facebook posts. Facebook has jumped on the hashtag search capability bandwagon, which I do not approve of one bit.

Hashtag if you must, but I still maintain that you just end up looking like a really bad speller.

So, #tomorrow on the #fourthofjuly #julyfourth #4th #4thofjuly #independenceday, when you #celebrate #celebratefreedom #celebrateyourfreedom, please take a moment to consider freeing yourself from hashtags.

It would really go a long way to making the world a better place.

Now, go #kissasoldier!

#Thanks! #Happyindependencedayeverybody!



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