Wednesday, January 25, 2012

My Wonderful Husband


Hello to all the loyal Just a Smidge readers out there. Marc’s wife Sandy here. You can call me Mrs. Smidge. We are having a first here at Smidge World Headquarters. Our faithful writer is down and out with the stomach flu, so I am sitting in. This is a momentous occasion, since aside from a couple of “best ofs,” Marc has not missed a week since beginning this column in 2008. Such a remarkable man!

All I can tell you is that this must be one powerful flu bug, because Marc never gets sick. I can count on one hand the amount of times he’s even had so much as a cold in the almost ten blissful years we’ve been married. He’s almost bullet-proof! I’m so lucky.

Since the Tyrannosaurus Rex of flu bugs has reduced my amazing husband to a pale, quivering, sweaty, huddled mass on the floor, I was not able to get a good answer from him on what my topic should be. The fever must be making him slightly crazy, because all he could say was, “Please, no.”

So, since humor writing is not my forte, I thought I would take this opportunity to tell you a little about what an amazing man Marc really is, and how incredibly lucky I am to have him. Literally every morning when I wake up, I thank God for letting me spend one more day with Marc. His captivating optimism, his intrepid courage in the face of danger, his super-incredible manliness, what can I say? He’s just awesome.

And he is such a hard worker! Up and at ‘em every morning, raring to go. He’s an incredible provider for our family. And speaking of our family, how blessed am I that Marc has given me three beautiful, healthy boys! The icing on the cake is that they all look just like him. Not only will that help them out later in life, when they grow up to be big, strong, devilishly handsome men like their father, but having them around the house as constant cherub-like reminders of my loving husband’s face keeps me sane during the hard times when I’m away from him in the middle of the day.

And I can’t forget to mention how smart he is. I don’t know if he’s ever had an IQ test, but I’m just positive he would be up around genius level. He seems to know everything about everything. And he sure is handy to have around the house when something breaks. It doesn’t matter whether it’s our toaster or our car, he always knows exactly what’s wrong with it. It never ceases to amaze me how many different things have a McGruder valve in them. It’s just a shame that McGruder valves can only be fixed with the one tool that is too cost prohibitive to own ourselves. I’m so lucky I am married to a genius that knows those kinds of things!

And did I mention how good looking he is? I guess I already did, but he’s so good looking it really bears repeating. I just can’t believe how lucky I am to have him. I even think it’s great that he went bald. Not too many people realize this, but men go bald because of high testosterone levels, and let me tell you ladies, I’m not complaining about that, if you know what I mean!

I think I should stop here, because at this point it feels like I’m just bragging. Hopefully he’ll be up and around to take care of next week’s column, because I know that this kind of thing embarrasses him. Did I mention how humble he is? I can’t believe I almost forgot that! Humility is one of his finest characteristics.

I just really can’t believe how lucky I am.

See you soon,

- Mrs. Smidge


Copyright © 2012 Marc Schmatjen


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